it's been awhile!

I haven't blogged in quite some time, but it's not like I've been avoiding. I've been terribly busy, and a lot has been happening over the last few weeks.

- I celebrated my 26th birthday. My dad gave us tickets to the Penguins Game, which just so happened to be mine and B's last gave ever at the Igloo. My 26th birthday was also the 2 year anniversary of my aunts death, so the day was bittersweet. That same day, I found out that my nono was diagnosed with cancer. Talk about dropping the bomb, huh? It's silly to say, but I'm convinced my birthday is cursed. Two years ago, B and I were literally moving in together when I found out my aunt died from cancer. It was a very difficult day for me.

- We thought we had several weeks, if not months or years, left with my nono but sadly he passed away only a few days later. It was a very fast progressive lung cancer and while it wasn't exactly a surprise, it came as a shock. I didn't even get to say goodbye, and I took his loss very hard.

- I spent five entire days with my family, missing my friends bachelorette party, and spent a lot of time crying. I threw myself a pity party, and now I'm trying to move on.

- I've been incredibly busy with work, and with doctors appointments. I was diagnosed with PCOS, which explains the unexplained weight gain even with all the diet and exercise. It explains the other problems, too, and we start seeing a RE Specialist next month. I'm really looking forward to meeting with her and getting things back on track. I'm hoping to learn a lot from her, and maybe even learn how to eat for my body and lose some weight before we start a family. From what I read, I need to eat a low-carb, high protein diet so I'm wondering if maybe seeing a nutritionist, now that I have an actual diagnosis, is the best thing for me. I'm a vegetarian, so high-protein can be tricky for me when I don't like tofu. I'm a pasta kind of girl, and not in moderation, either! Once I started gaining weight even with the diet and exercise, I threw the whole being healthy plan right out the window. I should probably get back on track. Now.

- I've been struggling lately with a "friend" [and I use that term very, very loosely] who is incredibly selfish. This individual is the kind of person who thinks they deserve everything, and expects a lot from others, but is unwilling to care for those around them. It's difficult for me to be around this person, it's difficult for me to be empathetic to their situation(s), and I'm glad that other people are starting to see them in the same light as me. For a long time, I was worried that I was in the wrong... that I wasn't seeing things clearly, that I was overreacting, that maybe I was the person who was a bad friend. It's something I've been thinking about for over a year now, talking about in therapy, and really worrying about. I'm glad [is that the right word?] that certain events have now come to light that have allowed other people to see this person for who they really are. It makes me feel better, in a twisted way, to know that I am not the only person who was hurt [I took things very personally], and to know that I am not the only person who thinks poorly of this individual. It's true: What goes around comes around.